Permission to say yes to you

Boundries!


I’ve been working a lot with boundaries lately—and realizing how deeply important it is to honor what we need.


For much of my life, I didn’t really believe I was allowed to have boundaries. Growing up, there wasn’t much room for them. So I became very good at accommodating, giving, bending, and allowing others to overstep my boundaries.


But my body knew.


I would feel that tightening inside. That familiar tension. And underneath it, anger would begin to rise.


I just didn’t know what to do with it so I would pull away.


The anger was actually telling me something important:
Something here isn’t okay with me. Something needs my attention.


I’m learning that a boundary isn’t about controlling someone else. It’s about becoming willing to listen to myself and honor what I discover.


It can sound like:


No, that doesn’t work for me.


This is what I need.


When this happens, this is how I feel.


I’m not available for that.


As I become more aware and authentically connected with myself I am leaning into the opportunities to speak up for myself.


A pleasant surprise...


Once I've said what I need to say, I can relax.


I don’t have to keep bracing myself. I don't have to hold onto the anger. I simply need to listen to myself and give my needs a voice.


And from that place, I can actually let go and enjoy myself again.


There is something incredibly empowering about realizing that we are allowed to say no.


We are allowed to change our minds.


We are allowed to ask for what we need.


We are allowed to leave the room, end the conversation, create distance, or simply say, “This doesn’t feel good to me.”


And perhaps most importantly, we don’t have to wait until we’re furious or ill to listen.


Sometimes the boundary begins with that very first tightening in the body.


That little inner whisper that says, Something here isn’t right for me.


Maybe that whisper is worth listening to.


Maybe honoring ourselves begins there.


Let go of the shore and trust the currents of life to take you there.


In Light,


Misty